The third step of the Alcoholics Anonymous 12-step program states, “We turned our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him.” This step is crucial as it offers individuals a choice, perhaps for the first time in a long while. This choice is rooted in whatever the individual has deemed to be their higher power.
As discussed in step two, we came to believe that a power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity. Now, in step three, we make the choice to act on that belief. Believing in a higher power is important, but what truly matters is how we act on that belief. The actions we take based on our faith play a massive role in our growth within recovery and how we handle future challenges.
Embracing Surrender
For many of us, life in addiction has been chaotic. Step three helps us break free from that chaos by practicing surrender. When we take an honest look at our lives, we often see that many of our choices were made impulsively, without considering the consequences.
This step teaches us that our thinking isn’t always the best guide. Living under our own rules has brought turmoil and pain. It’s when we learn to practice daily surrender that we experience the results. We start to see and understand things differently and view this world from a changed lens.
By surrendering our will and our lives to our higher power, we start to see improvements over time. We find more peace and serenity because we are living according to our higher power’s will, not our own.
Here are some practical ways to embrace surrender in Step Three:
- Start your day with a prayer or meditation, asking your higher power for guidance and strength.
- When faced with a challenging situation, consciously decide to let go of the need to control the outcome. Trust that your higher power will guide you to the best resolution.
- Regularly consult with a sponsor, mentor, or trusted friend. Their insights can help you see situations from a different perspective and reinforce the practice of surrender.
- Keep a journal where you reflect on moments when you tried to control situations versus when you surrendered to your higher power. Note the differences in outcomes and how you felt in each scenario.
- Participate in support group meetings where you can share your experiences and hear how others practice surrender.
- Use positive affirmations that reinforce the concept of surrender, such as “I trust my higher power to guide me.”
- Engage in mindfulness activities like yoga or deep breathing exercises. These practices can help you stay present and reduce the urge to control every aspect of your life.
- Volunteer or do some service work in your community. Acts of service can shift your focus from self-will to the greater good.
- Read books or articles that inspire and deepen your understanding of surrender and spirituality. This can provide new insights and strengthen your resolve.
- Take time to reflect on past experiences where surrendering led to positive outcomes.
Practicing Humility
Another key aspect of this step is humility. Acknowledging that our will and thinking have led us to this point requires a significant level of humility. It’s not easy to admit that we have been wrong. However, by practicing humility, we often find that our situations turn out better than we could have imagined.
Humility, like many other aspects of recovery, is a practice. It is essential for this step because without it, we risk reverting to our own willpower and the life we are trying to leave behind.
Here are some practical ways you can practice humility:
- Admitting your mistakes instead of blaming others or the situation.
- Seeking help rather than relying solely on ourselves.
- Listening actively to others’ viewpoints without interrupting or dismissing them.
- Giving credit to others for success rather than talking all the credit.
- Accepting feedback gracefully.
- Serving others without seeking recognition or reward.
- Acknowledging your limitations rather than pretending to have all the answers.
- Expressing gratitude for the support and kindness of others.
One of my favorite sayings in recovery is, “God is doing for me what I could not do for myself.” When I surrender to my higher power, life becomes so much better. Challenges become easier to handle, and I feel like a changed person. By practicing surrender, humility and spirituality, you can be amazed by the positive changes waiting around the corner. All of these are key to reaching that point of truly letting go of our past and building upon our newly found recovery.
